2010 is the year that all girls and women must break free from body image and weight issues. Stop wasting your life in self-hatred and learn to feel fabulous now.

I know weight and eating issues can be a heavy burden so I made this light-hearted video to encourage you to drop the weight and embrace the joy, fun and freedom of being alive today.

I also want to invite you to cash in on the Independence Day Sale at icreatehabits.com right away!!!

Buy one weight loss hypnosis CD and get one free. Visit icreatehabits.com for details.

It’s my body. If I go out on a date and a guy buys me dinner, I do not owe him a kiss or anything else. A simple, “thank you,” does the job just fine. Despite what society might say, my body is not my currency.

It’s my body. If I overeat at a party today, because the food is just so good, I do not need to restrict or over-exercise tomorrow. My body needs to be nourished, everyday, and never deserves to be punished.

It’s my body. If I have been abused, my body does not deserve to be hated. My body is not disgusting because of what someone else did to me. My body is not something to feel ashamed of or to hide. I cherish my body.

It’s my body. If I am sick, I need to give my body rest and do whatever it takes to get well. My body is not invincible. It is fragile. I must not abuse it with food, alcohol, drugs, or anything else. I must take care of it.

It’s my body. Today my organs are nourished and can function properly. I get enough sleep. I am strong. I do things that feel enjoyable like hiking, swimming, getting a massage, yoga, or even kissing my date — when I choose to do so.

It’s my body. I do not look like you or anyone else. You might be taller or thinner than me. By societal standards, you might be prettier than me. But you are not me. And I am not you.

It’s your body. Respect it. Nourish it. Love it.

Jenni Shaefer will be a guest on The Sheri and Erin Show on February 18, 2010. You can visit the show page to set a reminder before the show so you won’t forget. Also, if you see this post after February 18 you can listen to the archive.

Here’s a link directly to Jenni Shaefer’s interview. You can listen to the archive using the player below.

Appointed to the Ambassador Council of the National Eating Disorders Association, Jenni Schaefer is a singer/songwriter, speaker, and author of Life Without Ed and Goodbye Ed, Hello Me. She is a consultant with the Center For Change in Orem, Utah and Las Vegas, Nevada. For more information, visit www.jennischaefer.com.

According to the article, “More often than not, images have been altered — historically with painstaking tricks of lighting and exposure and, more recently, with retouching software that can make celebrities and models look thinner, taller, unblemished, with brighter eyes and whiter teeth. Seemingly perfect. Advances in digital photography have made it so easy to manipulate photographs that cover models often resemble weirdly synthesized creatures or, as the photographer Peter Lindbergh described them this week, “objects from Mars.”” >>>Read more at New York Times.com

While you’re there, be sure to check out the video opinion piece, Sex, Lies and Photoshop, why magazines should let readers know if images have been retouched by Jesse Epstein, the director of Wet Dreams and False Images. Here is the trailer for her movie:

When I was seven, I wanted to be a roller derby queen and the highlight of my life was the newest Elton John and KiKi Dee “45″, Don’t Go Breakin’ My Heart. I remember putting it on the turntable in the back yard and either roller skating or hula hooping the entire time it played. I would play it 5, 10, 20 times in a row. If I wasn’t roller skating or hula hooping I was lip synching or dancing.

All links go to iTunes.

Other life-changing tunes from my childhood include: Sir Duke by Stevie Wonder, Play That Funky Music by Wild Cherry, Precious by the Pretenders, Jocko Homo by Devo, Blue Bayou by Linda Ronstadt , Rappers Delight by Sugar Hill Gang, and I Left My Wallet in El Segundo and Can I Kick It by A Tribe Called Quest.

There were the punk and alternative bands of the 80’s like G.B.H., Joy Division, Social Distortion, CH3, T.S.O.L., Shattered Faith, Naked Raygun and more which also had an impact. I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the uncategorizible raps and rhymes of the Beastie Boys.

(Here I am at the LAist holiday party singing Pretty Vacant by the Sex Pistols using the Guitar Hero game. Earlier in the evening I sang One Way or Another by Blondie and Purple Haze by Jimi Hendrix. I got 79-90% accuracy on all of them.)

The older I got, the more I was scolded for such immature behavior and socially unacceptable music choices. I was trained to be a “proper Christian”. To cross my legs, to wear pigtails and to be skinny. I was trained to be dumb on purpose because “it intimidates the men if you’re too smart.”

I tried to maintain my “self” the best I could. I rebelled against all conformity. But eventually it got to me. The mean looks, the conversations behind my back, the cold shoulders. I was fired more than once just because I spoke my mind and people told me “you’re crazy” for as long as I can remember.

Why bring all that unecessary hardship on myself? I figured it would be easier to just follow the rules and get along.

So I tried to blend in. To be the “me” everyone else says to be. Tried to lose weight even though I love my curves, tried to eat more vegetables, tried not to eat dessert, I made sure to smile just right, to have good breath, to not be too sassy, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

In my 20’s and 30’s I pretty much acted perfect all day then came home and swallowed the refrigerator.

In University I learned how to “say it right, put it in APA format, double-space it and use 12-point font.” I learned big words and a series of scientifically unfounded psychological theories as well as a long list of labels, diagnoses and pharmacuetical cures for all that ails the human mind. I learned to “be professional!” at all costs.

If I was going to maintain this game, I knew it was imperative that I discontinue all connection with night life. Not even time to listen to records. No more time for punk rock gigs. My textbooks were my late-night and early morning reading. My entire life revolved around devouring volumes of research journals and psychology textbooks, getting good grades and regurgitating information the way my instructors wanted me to.

I played the game all the way to the end. I got a master’s degree and I’ll be damned if I ever get a PhD.

What finally happened is that I imploded. I became entirely incapable of performing the act. In some ways, “I” fell apart. The “I” I thought I was that is. I couldn’t do it anymore. Sheri O. was crying out for attention and she was ready to do some crazy shit like roller derby and punk rock to get it. Sheri O. won.

What I want to know is this: are our spunky girls with a creative edge being adequately nurtured these days or are they being stifled by the oh-so-rigorous training for the position of “Queen”?

Are they enjoying and embracing their youth, their skills and their talents or are they busy hating everything about themselves from their eyebrows to their toe nails? Will they have to wait until they’re 40 to realize that being themselves is the easiest and most beautiful thing there is? How many more generations can we afford to let this happen?

The truth is, none of us needs to be a perfect King or Queen, that’s a job reserved for the King and Queen. In England, everyone is very clear that there is only one Queen and Elizabeth is it. Nobody tries to be Queen because they know they can’t be and won’t be. We need to stop trying to be something that we’re not. I don’t say that to defeat progress but instead to encouarge you to be your best self, not some lame imitation of who you think you can and should be. Faking it is a total waste of time, trust me.

If you need help with finding the true you again or if you want to be sure to maintain the real you without crumbling beneath criticism, get my book From Sabotage to Success.

Buy the Stress-Free Workout on Amazon.
Buy Stress-Free Slimming at CD Baby.com

I’m really dead serious about it. Because for what seems like eternity I have been hating and condeming my body and everything about me day and night, night and day.

Now, if the Law of Attraction is true, how can I possibly attract anything good to myself if I am in CONSTANT struggle? That makes about as much sense as dancing and trying not to dance.

I’ve created a program called Donate Your Weight and it’s not about trying to be perfect or reach an unrealistic ideal. It’s about listening to yourself. It’s about going back to who you were before everyone started piling an overwhelming amount of rules and regulations on top of you. It’s about being free.

If that’s what you’re ready for, then come check us out. We have a free, membership-based on-line community and you can purchase our study at-home course and do this process at your own pace.

I’m going to keep it brief because the truth is, I’ve got enough to say about this that I can post one blog a day for at least a year and not run out of topics.

In short, I’ve been a walking victim for 42 or more years and I made it all up. Here’s how:

My mom and dad split up when I was 9 months old. He never wrote, called or sent child support. I made up a story about it. Here are the highlights:

*My dad doesn’t love me
*If my own dad doesn’t love me, I must be awful
*Nobody loves me

The rest of the story highlights are simply a reinforcement of above.

Well, according to the Object Relations theory, an off-shoot of Freudian psychotherapy, I created my dad as a “bad object”. He hurt me, he abandonded me so I made up a story that basically “men cannot be trusted”. I stuck to the story whether it was true or not.

If I had a bad guy in my life, I used it as evidence. If I had a good guy, I made a point of turning him into a bad guy, even if I had to make it up.

According to A Course in Miracles, we can’t see reality because all we’re seeing is a replay of our fears. The Course says we can surrender the illusion of fear to the Holy Spirit and have our sight restored.

So, that might have been what happened tonight.

Long story short, I have seen my dad in person 3 times. The last time was over a year ago when we decided to forgive each other and try to have a relationship. From that moment, the illusion began to crumble.

Tonight it came tumbling down.

After working on Sharareh’s dissertation for 7 hours I came home and saw a book on my table. A book titled “Victory Over the Darkness.” A book my dad bought for me on Amazon.com and had shipped to my house.

It hit me. My dad is in my life now. He loves me. He wants me to forgive him. He drove across country to see me. But still, the remanents of the old story linger in the recesses of my mind.

Tonight, I thought: “What if I just let the story go right now?” “What if I had a new story about a miraculous reunification?” “What if this story could help me AND other people?”

That seemed logical. So I dropped the story and it felt pretty good.

P.S. If this story did help you, I would recommend that you subscribe to this blog because I haven’t even begun to tell it. Stay tuned.

P.P.S. Above is a picture of me and my dad at Denny’s last year when we met for the 3rd time ever and decided to forgive and let go.

I have decided that the someone should be me.

If this candid discussion about child abuse and how it impacts adults sparks something within you, contact me. Click play to listen:

Many adults who were abused as children continue to suffer with addictions, fears, depression, physical illness and self-destructive behavior.

I am interested in speaking to groups about the long-term effects of child abuse including addictions and self-sabotage. If you need a speaker for a group of therapists or social workers or if you are a service club and want to raise money for your youth program, let me know. You can reach me at 562-305-3434 or e-mail me at sherizampelli@gmail.com.

If you need help overcoming self-defeating behaviors like perfectionism, fear and procrastination, check out my book, From Sabotage to Success.

If you want resources for overcoming the impact of child abuse or, if you need help stopping self-sabotage, we can help. Simply sign up for our free mailing list and we will instantly send you a free report titled “Break Any Bad Habit.” This report includes step by step instructions and a guide to overcoming self-sabotage now.

The podcast is about loving your body, breaking free from diets and diet mentality and being liberated from food and body obsession so you can live your life in peace, happiness and contentment.

I decided to move the podcast player and podcast announcements to the Change Your Chi network which includes an on-line forum, blogs, support groups and much more. Join now while the membership is free and get access to:

**Motivational podcasts
**Motivational tips
**Healthy Recipes
**A Support Group especially for people interested in Donate Your Weight

All you have to do is become a member at Change Your Chi Network. There is no cost. You can also access other resources such as:

**Feng Shui
**Financial Freedom is Sexy
**Great American Detox Diet
**Book Group
**Joyful Business
and more.

For details, visit me at Change Your Chi Network

The Doll Factory was a meeting place and resource hub for clean up activities and recycling in the Echo Park/Hi-Fi (Historic Filipino Town) area of Los Angeles. Volunteers came to the Doll Factory to pick up brooms and shovels and help in clean up efforts.

Meanwhile, inside the Doll Factory, young girls learned to skate, bagels and coffee were served and hourly workshops were held on the topics of body image, nutrition, tai chi, self-defense and yoga.

At 10:30, the Mayor Villaraigosa and Los Angeles Laker Jordan Farmar along with other local celebrities arrived to address the crowd and watch the kids skate.

I had the opportunity to co-facilitate the body image workshop with Jenny Wright. We had a nice time talking about how to love and respect your body despite it’s size or shape. I used a body atlas and my personal body image crisis story to help women consider all of the wonderful things our body does for us every day.

I brought index cards, markers and stickers and each participant made one to three cards with positive statements on them. I encouraged participants to take the cards home and put them some place where they can see them everyday. I also shared info about my Love Your Body, Love Yourself CD because I listened to a cassette tape just like it in the 90’s and it really helped me to begin appreciating my body and to break free from self-hate. This day provided a positive opportunity for all involved, it was a win-win scenario all the way around.

All Donate Your Weight Podcasts have been moved to the On-Line Forums. You can go there now and listen to podcasts for free >>>>

This show explores and explodes food myths and diet mentality and helps you to own your own power in regards to food and eating. Learn to pay attention to your body and break free from food rules and diet mentality.

Show Sponsor:
Girl Friday Now

Books Mentioned on the Podcast: (links to Amazon.com)
Donate Your Weight by Sheri Zampelli

Resources Mentioned
Upcoming Donate Your Weight membership plans

Points Covered:
Pay attention to your body
You were programmed to be overweight
You learned food rules
You were born naturally thin
Diets create diet mentality and make some foods good and some foods bad
You can own your power when making food choices

Songs Played: (links to iTunes)
Inner Child at Play by The Flavor Foundation
Go For It
Mind, Body and Soul
Illumination by The Flavor Foundation

Listen to the show by clicking the play button on the player above.

To make sure you don’t miss any of the future shows, subscribe to this blog or subscribe to the podcast in iTunes today.

Support the show by visiting our sponsors or, become a sponsor yourself. For information on our sponsorship packages, contact us at podcast [at] donateyourweight.com today.