This 6:48 video is guaranteed to make even the hardest of hard asses laugh. I dare you to watch this and control your laughter. I’ll bet you can’t.
Also a beautiful demonstration of how laughter is a Universal language. (Click here to watch it on YouTube).
There’s a lot of talk about the Law of Attraction lately. In the book
Ask and It Is Given by Esther and Jerry Hicks, there is an Emotional Guidance Scale that can help you identify your current emotional state. The list has 22 items. The top entry includes Joy, Love, Appreciation, Knowledge, Empowerment and Freedom. When you’re in this emotional state, you are more likely to attract good things into your life.
The bottom entry on the list includes Fear, Grief, Depression, Despair and Powerlessness. Worry is #14 on the list.
If you’re a worrier, you probably have some of the symptoms of anxiety:
Sleeplessness
Tension
Eczema
Insomnia
Sweaty plams
Racing heart and
Racing mind
Medication should be a short term solution for these symptoms at best. Read the fine print. Most of your medications have an overwhelming amount of side effects including death!
Hypnosis can help you decrease anxiety symptoms and all the power to do it is in your own mind under your own control.
On March 3, 2009 I’m going to give a free workshop about hypnosis for anxiety. If you’d like to download a PDF flier for the event, click here. Or, you can read my previous blog where I gave all the details.
In the meantime, if you feel anxious, remember to “reach for relief” as Esther and Jerry Hicks would say. See if you can do or think something that will make you feel a little bit better, until you eventually reach a state of Joy, or at least close to Joy.
We often hear stories of war torn countries and starving children. It seems so far away and foreign that it’s difficult to remember that there are real people, children included, with real feelings who are being traumatized and living sub-standard, terrifying lives. This is like child abuse magnified. The impact of this trauma is far reaching and long-term.
I believe that when we calculate the cost of war, we need to factor these traumatized children and their damaged lives into the picture. Notice the intensity of emotion and expression that this child in the video displays as she describes wearing gas soaked clothes, eating food that tastes like gas and living in terror everyday of her life.
I am no expert on trauma but I work closely with people who are and I can speak to the long-term impact of living in an unpredictable, violent, chaotic environment as a child. If you have experienced trauma and are looking for a healer, I would recommend Yaffa Balsam, James Hyman or Tina Tessina. Each person brings his or her own expertise into the mix. Balsam and Tessina are both licensed therapists, James Hyman is a shamanic healer who does Deep Emotional Release Bodywork.
A couple of weeks ago I went to see a Shaman healer in Los Angeles. The truth is, I’ve been visiting James Hyman sporadically for the past 10 years. But because I was so concerned about what people would think, I kept my powerful tool a secret.
I originally went to see James Hyman for Deep Emotional Release Bodywork because I had tried talk therapy but it seemed that no matter how much I talked, there was always this sense of panic, fear and emptiness in the pit of my gut. I literally felt stuck.
In my first session with James I released more emotion than I even knew existed. The sense of freedom was so great that I told one friend, then another, then another. After having every single one of them come back permanently renewed, I can no longer keep a secret. In fact, I’ve even begun the process to become an Emotional Release Bodywork practitioner myself.
Now, I want to clarify what I mean when I say “something unusual” happened.
The first time I went to see James, he did a variety of energy healing techniques and at some point lightly touched my upper right shoulder. I sobbed and howled although he was barely touching me. I didn’t know what was happening.
A few months later, I had a heart to heart with my mom and some how she admits to me that the reason my right arm was in a cast at age 2 is because my step-dad broke it. (See earlier blog for details).
It was much later that I had an ah-ha.
The same arm my step-dad broke is the arm I howled about when James did his healing. Is it possible that my body stored the trauma of my broken arm for 40 years?
I will tell you one thing. I have no conscious memory of the event. So, even after years of talk therapy and 12-step groups and all that good stuff, I never talked about my broken arm because I didn’t even know it existed, but evidently, my body did.
Since that healing, a burden was lifted from me. I feel lighter and freer. This is why I want to share this work with others. It is so much more effective and speedy than traditional therapy when it comes to healing trauma and releasing blocked emotions.
If you’re one of those people who’s “tried everything” or if you feel like your emotions are blocked and you can’t break free on your own, you might want to try this technique.
James Hyman is conducting a workshop in Los Angeles on February 21, 2009 from 9:30-5:30. He also sees private clients. Call Barbara, at (323) 684-6157, or (800) 700-6420 to set an appointment. I have added this powerful technique to my own hypnosis practice in Long Beach. Call (562) 305-3434 to schedule an appointment with me.
These days self-help gurus are available on any street corner in L.A. The healing industry is blossoming. But as with any trend, many of the newcomers on the scene simply imitate and modify their predecessor’s style rather than create something entirely unique.
So, many healers adopt certain characteristics: dreadlocks, cotton clothes, raw food, yoga mats, etc. But me, I grew up listening to the Ramones and G.B.H. I slammed in the pit when the Circle Jerks played at Perkins Palace in 1983. I dyed my hair blue. I tried out for roller derby. I’m just not the type to go for linen and wood beads in the lotus position. It’s too much of a stretch.
The great news is, I finally figured out I don’t have to look like anything or eat a certain way to have personal enlightenment. I can do it without paying a guru hundreds of dollars per session. Because here’s what it is: It’s all energy. If your energy is clear and clean, meaning no judgment, no fear, no criticism and if you can live in the moment – not the past or the future – you are experiencing enlightenment. At least I think that’s what Eckhart Tolle and Marianne Williamson are trying to say.
When you are aware of what you are doing, you can begin to see how one event leads to another. I blog about this stuff all the time but one of the recent examples I can think of is when I went to see my favorite band, Naked Raygun for free. They are from Chicago but just happened to be playing less than 2 miles from my house at Alex’s Bar in Long Beach, CA, USA. The drummer, Eric Spicer called me on my cell phone to set it up. That felt like a synchronistic positive, flowing chain of events that lead to favorable outcome for all involved (read the complete story on my mog).
So, who says you have to burn incense, light candles and chant to feel connected? Not me. I’m sitting here listening to Joy Division, just like I used to when I was 16 and guess what? I feel like I’m 16.
I don’t mean I feel intensely insecure, moody and impulsive, I mean I feel raw. I feel alert and aware and connected. The bass guitar from She’s Lost Control resonates with my cells. I can remember what it felt like when I listened to this song every day of my teen life. How many times did I lip synch the words, “She’s Lost Control again”? 1,000? 5,000? more? When I listen to the tunes of my youth, I see how every experience I encounter is building me and how I react to them is building me as well.
I started forgetting that by the time I was 21. I closed in on myself. I was stuck in hell. The hell of hating my body, hating myself and feeling disconnected from everything. I think roller derby might of knocked some sense into me, it got me back to feeling my body and having to learn to react to my surroundings. I skated with the LA Derby Dolls for about 1 year as a fresh meat. Even though I never got on a team, the experience changed the way I live my life.
So, if you’re just not quite down with colonics, whole food and hemp shoes, try digging out your old records or buying some of your old favorites on iTunes. Maybe join roller derby? Whatever you choose, remember to sit back, soak it all in and live a little.
(If you need music suggestions, I regularly post playlists and I post a song of the week from Michael Zampelli. Check out some of the tunes on this site and see if they put a pep in your step.)
In this article you’ll see a picture of my Joy Division LP I just took the other day. See how worn out it is? I played it every single day. And you know what? All those years I never knew what Ian Curtis looked like. So I looked it up on YouTube and it was so cool to, in a sense, relive that time of my life. It wasn’t all peaches and cream back then but it was an incredibly free spirited and creative time and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.
P.S. Holosynch CD’s use sound waves to heal the brain and create awareness. They have a free demo CD available on their website. You listen with headphones and it will help with anxiety and depression as well as addictive behavior. Check it out.
I’m helping my friend with her doctoral dissertation. The important thing I want to say about it right now is that its on the topic of how Object Relations relates to eating disorders. I also need to say I read A Course in Miracles everyday. The reason for the above two sentences will make sense in a moment. Especially if you know that both of these schools of thought believe that we create our reality based on our pain and fear.
I’m going to keep it brief because the truth is, I’ve got enough to say about this that I can post one blog a day for at least a year and not run out of topics.
In short, I’ve been a walking victim for 42 or more years and I made it all up. Here’s how:
My mom and dad split up when I was 9 months old. He never wrote, called or sent child support. I made up a story about it. Here are the highlights:
*My dad doesn’t love me
*If my own dad doesn’t love me, I must be awful
*Nobody loves me
The rest of the story highlights are simply a reinforcement of above.
Well, according to the Object Relations theory, an off-shoot of Freudian psychotherapy, I created my dad as a “bad object”. He hurt me, he abandonded me so I made up a story that basically “men cannot be trusted”. I stuck to the story whether it was true or not.
If I had a bad guy in my life, I used it as evidence. If I had a good guy, I made a point of turning him into a bad guy, even if I had to make it up.
According to A Course in Miracles, we can’t see reality because all we’re seeing is a replay of our fears. The Course says we can surrender the illusion of fear to the Holy Spirit and have our sight restored.
So, that might have been what happened tonight.
Long story short, I have seen my dad in person 3 times. The last time was over a year ago when we decided to forgive each other and try to have a relationship. From that moment, the illusion began to crumble.
Tonight it came tumbling down.
After working on Sharareh’s dissertation for 7 hours I came home and saw a book on my table. A book titled “Victory Over the Darkness.” A book my dad bought for me on Amazon.com and had shipped to my house.
It hit me. My dad is in my life now. He loves me. He wants me to forgive him. He drove across country to see me. But still, the remanents of the old story linger in the recesses of my mind.
Tonight, I thought: “What if I just let the story go right now?” “What if I had a new story about a miraculous reunification?” “What if this story could help me AND other people?”
That seemed logical. So I dropped the story and it felt pretty good.
P.S. If this story did help you, I would recommend that you subscribe to this blog because I haven’t even begun to tell it. Stay tuned.
P.P.S. Above is a picture of me and my dad at Denny’s last year when we met for the 3rd time ever and decided to forgive and let go.
I used to be way more uptight than I am now. In fact, I was so anxious I almost thought I’d jump right out of my skin. I tried talking about it in therapy but it turns out, sometimes talking just isn’t enough. In fact, there is scientific brain research that shows how trauma is stored in the amygdala which is separate from the neo-cortex or “thinking” part of the brain. Therefore, talking is sometimes not enough to help heal trauma.
I’ve had plenty of trauma in my life and some of it happened before I was even able to speak. It turns out that just because you don’t remember traumatic events or just because you “grow up” doesn’t mean the impact of trauma goes away, the emotional impact of trauma can actually stay stored in your body and can be expressed in many non-verbal ways such as anxiety or physical illness.
Part of my healing has been my work with Los Angeles based Master healer/teacher/Shaman, James Hyman, founder of the Deep Emotional Release Bodywork and Quantum Healing.
James’ work takes you to the core of your issues to help you release the associated blocks held in the body and subconscious mind. His work helps balance the chakras, open up the higher mind centers, and takes you to a new level on your path of Spiritual Awakening. His work also brings about new insight and Self-awareness and a strong sense of internal well-being and self-esteem. After working with James you will feel lighter, as if a heavy burden has been lifted. Sometimes you’ll even have the direct physical experience of bliss and enlightenment.
I’m always telling my friends about James Hyman and many people I know have travelled to see him, driving over and hour each way, yet always glad they did.
This week I have a special announcement for my Long Beach and Orange County friends, James Hyman has offered to schedule a day of sessions in Long Beach, CA this Friday, November 14. There are only 5 openings left.
I know it’s short notice but I also know that if it’s meant to be, it will work out for whoever it’s supposed to work out for. The sessions will be held at the Everyday Zen Relaxation Studio located at 3740 Atlantic Blvd, Suite #201, in Long Beach, just north of the 405 freeway.
If you’re one of those people who’ve talked and talked in therapy but just never felt like you got anywhere, or if you feel burdened or stuck because of unresolved emotional isssues, this technique could help free you.
Some of you are my friends and you’ve already experienced a session with James. If you’re ready for a tune up or if you want to pass this information on to a friend, now would be a good time to do that. To schedule an appointment or ask questions, call (323) 684-6157 and ask for Barbara or e-mail emotionalrelease@gmail.com.
“I want to love myself as much as Fenix loves himself. That’s my goal”, I stated firmly.
You see, I was telling my master mind partner, Sharareh, “I think God loves me at least as much as I love my cat”. I was reasoning that if I, as imperfect and conditional as I am, can spoil a stray and feed him gourmet food and take him to the groomer at $50 a pop, then certainly God who is almighty, omnipotent and unconditional can take pretty good care of me if I just let Him. Shrareh said, “You have to love yourself as much as Fenix loves himself.”
Loving myself as much as Fenix loves himself has been my goal for the past 3 months. Fenix is a long-haired, Tabby Persian cat. He came to live with us in 2001, 2 days after our house caught on fire and we went to live in a hotel for 8 months.
When we came home to visit our belongings and pack needed items for our stay away from home, we saw this furry orange and white cat poking its head around corners and eventually working his way to live in a box on the porch. I had wanted a kitty for years but my husband insisted it would be disaster since we already had a dog. When I saw this scared, furry kitty on our porch, I couldn’t help but take it a can of tuna. Little did I know, two minutes later I had a friend for life. After a few bites of tuna, he darted in the front door and straight to the family room.
“We can’t have a cat now”, proclaimed my husband. I had to admit, this time he was right. So, I scooped up the kitty, walked him to the front door and set him on the porch. Before I could close the door, he whisked past my legs and straight into the family room again. With some pleading and guilt trips, I persuaded my husband to let us keep him. We named him Fenix because he’s “out of the fire.” The spelling was inspired by Felix the Cat.
So off we went: Fenix, Hubby, me and Koya (a white Samoyed). We lived together in a condo loft for 8 months. When everything was prepared, we returned to a beautifully redesigned and brand-new home with all members of the family in tact.
Fenix was coming to live in our home for the first time so we kept a tight rein on him until he realized this is his new and permanent home. We’ve been back in the house almost 4 years now and if Fenix ever runs off, he’s usually very close by and begging to be let in the house within 15 minutes.
Last Saturday was different. We were gone from home most of the day and night and left an opening for the dog to get in and out while we were gone. When we came home, Fenix was nowhere to be found. Not this night or the night after or the night after that. Fenix was gone for 5 ½ days before he showed up on the porch again, ready to be let in.
So now that you know who Fenix is, I still haven’t told you about my goal to “love myself as much as Fenix loves himself.” You see, as a survivor of an abusive upbringing, I somehow got the idea that I was responsible for everything and that somehow if I controlled my behavior, I could control my environment and make people love me or treat me well. As a result, I guess you could say I became a control freak. Being a control freak is extremely exhausting and their aren’t really any good payoffs to it. In fact, it seems to me that the people who are happiest and most successful do a lot of letting go. They allow others to help them. They have fun. They work in teams. They believe that they are “worth it”. In many ways, I think thats the majority of what sets success and failure apart. Well, I want success and happiness so I decided to take a lesson from my cat.
Fenix is a perfect example of letting go and receiving. When he wants love, he jumps on my lap, when he doesn’t, he bites me and runs away. When he’s hungry, he eats, when he’s thirsty he drinks. Never once does he have to sit and wonder where his next meal will come from. He boldly showed up on our porch one day, decided he was home and refused to leave. We caved into his wishes and went on to not only feed and groom him but give him and extremely loving environment to live in daily. When I worry about life and not having enough, I look at Fenix. Sometimes I even stretch or take a nap.
When Fenix ran off, right in the middle of this whole lesson, I had to wonder…how does all of this fit in the plan? I love Fenix, he loves me, why is he gone? Well, here’s what I realized today. Fenix was not only bold enough to come proclaiming his princehood once. He actually has the nerve to take off, do his own thing for five days, come back with no explanation and march right in like he’s the owner. He never once had to wonder “Do you think they’ll let me back in? Do you think they still love me?” I can tell you, he didn’t waste one second planning his alibi or practicing his excuses.
Just when I thought I loved myself as much as Fenix loves himself, I realized I had to kick it up another notch and let go of the past. Just like I don’t hold it against Fenix for “leaving” and “breaking my heart” for 5 days, I know that when I truly love and forgive myself, I find people and situations that accept me as I am and who can love me even when I make mistakes. I also know that when I accept myself, I’m far more accepting of others and their “faults.”
What I learned from Fenix is that I need to let myself off the hook for being less than perfect in the past and to realize that love conquers all. I know that at any moment I can choose to let go of the past and experience the peace of now, rather than the turmoil of the past or future, and I learned it from a long-haired Persian cat named Fenix.
Sheri O. Zampelli is the author of From Sabotage to Success.
