Imagine a specific time when you felt completely successful. What was the weather like? What were you wearing? Who else was with you? What did your surroundings look, smell, or sound like? Once you’ve practiced visualizing past successes, take a moment to think about a goal you’d like to attain. Fast forward in time and imagine in vivid detail that you’ve already achieved this goal. Transfer your feelings regarding past successes onto this new scenario. After you open your eyes, carry that feeling of success with you into the rest of the day.
Posts Tagged ‘self-sabotage’
See It, Believe It, Make It Real Part One
Wednesday, May 4th, 2011
One way to sabotage success is by mentally imagining failure, thereby setting yourself up to fail before you even getting started. For example, some of us “practice” failing a test by telling ourselves, “I’ll never pass that test, I should have studied more.” When we take the test our mind freezes in anxiety and we prove ourselves right. We fail. When we daydream failure, we are engaging in negative self-talk and negative self-imaging.
Changing your self-image can help you move closer to the life you desire. When you imagine a well-received speech, a compatible date or a stress-free exam in rich, vivid detail, you’re gearing your mind and body for success instead of failure.
Begin practicing positive imagery by setting aside quiet time to visualize success. Close your eyes, take a deep breath and imagine what success feels like. If you felt completely successful, how would you carry yourself? What would you feel like?
Imagine a specific time when you felt completely successful. What was the weather like? What were you wearing? Who else was with you? What did your surroundings look, smell, or sound like? Once you’ve practiced visualizing past successes, take a moment to think about a goal you’d like to attain. Fast forward in time and imagine in vivid detail that you’ve already achieved this goal. Transfer your feelings regarding past successes onto this new scenario. After you open your eyes, carry that feeling of success with you into the rest of the day.
Imagine a specific time when you felt completely successful. What was the weather like? What were you wearing? Who else was with you? What did your surroundings look, smell, or sound like? Once you’ve practiced visualizing past successes, take a moment to think about a goal you’d like to attain. Fast forward in time and imagine in vivid detail that you’ve already achieved this goal. Transfer your feelings regarding past successes onto this new scenario. After you open your eyes, carry that feeling of success with you into the rest of the day.
Why Do You Keep Doing the Same Things, Expecting Different Results?
Wednesday, April 13th, 2011 |
| From icreatehabits.com |
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| From ICreateReality |
Self Esteem: You Are Not Who You Think You Are by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
Wednesday, February 23rd, 2011
David sat in front of me at one of my five-day intensive workshops. A successful businessman with a wife and two grown children, David believed that he was not good enough.
“I’m insufficient,” he said. “I’m inadequate.”
I looked at this kind man and felt deep sadness for him. He did not know who he was.
“Why do you believe that?” I asked.
“I didn’t do well in school, and I’ve made lots of mistakes in my life.”
“So you are basing your worth on your performance, right?”
“Of course.”
David could not conceive of any other way of defining his worth other than through his performance – which he never saw as good enough.
I asked David to look inside – at the essence of himself - and tell me what he sees. All he saw was emptiness.
“David, please close your eyes. Now imagine a wonderful being who loves you very much. Who comes to mind?”
“My grandfather. He died when I was young, but he really loved me.”
“Good. Now imagine that you are seeing yourself through the eyes of your grandfather. What does your grandfather see when he looks at you?”
“He sees a bright and creative little boy, who is very kind and caring. A loving little boy. A little boy who is funny and likes to laugh, and likes to make other people laugh.”
“Is there anything wrong with this little boy? Anything inadequate or insufficient?”
“Oh no! He is a wonderful little boy.”
“David, this is who you really are. You are not your performance. Your performance will come and go and at some point you might retire and not perform at all. Yet that does not mean that you are, therefore, worthless. Your worth is in who you are, not in what you do. Your worth in intrinsic.”
David realized that, because of his highly critical and rejecting parents, he had always been trying to prove himself and always came up short in their eyes. As a result of seeing himself as unworthy and inadequate, he did not treat himself well. He treated himself the way his parents had treated him – with criticism and neglect. He was always trying to take care of everyone else, but rarely thought about taking care of himself. He was constantly abandoning himself emotionally, just as he had been emotionally abandoned by his parents.
“David, if you chose to see yourself as your grandfather saw you rather than how your parents saw you, how would you feel about yourself and how would you treat yourself?”
“I’ve just been thinking about that. I just realized that I treat my dog better than I treat myself! I would never judge my dog the way I judge myself.”
“So what would you do differently if you saw yourself the way your grandfather sees you?”
“I would stop judging myself as insufficient and inadequate. I’m a really good person. I am not at all insufficient or inadequate as a person. And I choose my friends based on who they are as people – not on their performance. So I obviously value the very qualities that I possess!”
“What else would you do if you really valued who you are?”
“I would listen to my own feelings and take care of my own needs instead of taking care of everyone else’s feelings and needs. I would no longer see it as selfish to take care of myself instead of taking care of everyone else. I would be at least as attentive to myself as I am to my dog!”
David was glowing. He was discovering who he really is, not who he thought he was.
People often think that their worth – who they really are – is based on looks and performance. Yet these qualities are transitory. What is real and eternal is who you are in your heart and soul. If you shift your definition of your worth from outer to inner, you will stop trying to prove yourself. You will know that you are already a beautiful being, totally deserving of love.
Margaret Paul, Ph.D., best-selling author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You” and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or email her at margaret@innerbonding.com to schedule a phone session.
Margaret Paul, Ph.D., best-selling author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You” and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or email her at margaret@innerbonding.com to schedule a phone session.
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| From Donate Your Weight |
The Struggle by Urban Voodoo – Hip-Hop Healing
Thursday, June 10th, 2010
I just downloaded The Struggle by Urban Voodoo. It's a song about the struggle of growing up in a chaotic, abusive environment and trying to break free.
There are many people who want to be a positive force in this world but find themselves bogged down by depression and anxiety that is directly related to living a life of trauma. It is important for us to support the adult children who want to uplift the youth of today if we ever hope to break these destructive cycles.
If you are 
bold enough to admit that abuse happens and that it leaves a lasting impact. If you are bold enough to support the children and not the adults who abuse them, spend 99 cents on this single. Go to: http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/urbanvoodoo
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If you're looking for step-by-step instruction on how to overcome self-sabotage, buy the book From Sabotage to Success.
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Get a Free Hypnosis Download: Create the Life You Want at icreatehabits.com From Sabotage to Success on She Speaks to Inspire
Saturday, October 24th, 2009
Does the story about your past hold you back? Do you sometimes believe that you can't possibly break free? This story is about defying the odds and using your story to empower others.
Sheri Zampelli speaks about her journey from abuse, addiction and homelessness to becoming a college educator, author and advocate. Let it inspire you to break free from self-imposed limitations and move forward in life.
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For step-by-step guidance to overcome self-sabotage, purchase Sheri's book, From Sabotage to Success.
Does the story about your past hold you back? Do you sometimes believe that you can't possibly break free? This story is about defying the odds and using your story to empower others.
Sheri Zampelli speaks about her journey from abuse, addiction and homelessness to becoming a college educator, author and advocate. Let it inspire you to break free from self-imposed limitations and move forward in life.
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For step-by-step guidance to overcome self-sabotage, purchase Sheri's book, From Sabotage to Success. Superheroes Slay Their Sabotuers at Whole Foods in Torrance
Tuesday, September 29th, 2009
Last night, I did a presentation at the Whole Foods market in Torrance titled: Become Your Own Superhero - Slay the sabotuer and reclaim your life.
I told the story of how I practiced with a roller derby team and became Galvanized and how I successfully slay my most powerful sabotuer: Puleza.
Puleza is a people-pleasing perfectionist with severe issues of unworthiness. If you encounter her just remember, you have more power than she does.
My book, From Sabotage to Success can help you gain and increase that power so you can use your strength for good.
If you'd like to come up with your own superhero name, check out these lists on Wikipedia :
List of Superheroines
List of Superheroes
Become Your Own Superhero – Slay the saboteur and reclaim your life
Saturday, September 19th, 2009
Free Presentation to the Community
Sheri Zampelli, M.S., CCH, author of From Sabotage to Success and certified hypnotherapist will teach you how to identify and overcome mental and emotional blocks that stand between you and your desires. She will show you how to use creative visualization and how to mobilize the power of humor and joy to get what you want. Prepare to have fun and leave feeling invincible.
When: Monday, September 28, 6:30-7:30
Open to: Whole Food customers and the general public
Where: Whole Foods Market, Torrance 2655 Pacific Coast Highway, Torrance CA 90505. The free presentation takes place in the upstairs Conference Room
Hosted by: District ONE Toastmasters Speakers Bureau www.communityspeakersbureau.org
Reserve your seat now by calling 562-305-3434 or by e-mail sheri@sherizampelli.com I Create Habits with Concepts Like “Cool”
Tuesday, May 12th, 2009
Somewhere along the line I got the message loud and clear, it's better to be cool than uncool and somehow, my concept of cool was equated with a James Dean type character - rebel without a cause. My life choices and relationships reflected this value. I thought the rebels were cool and I wanted to be like them more than I wanted to be like the "uncool" people. This had it's upside and it's downside.
On the upside, I got to be at the cutting edge with some very cool, creative, unique people. I never tried to fit in to the mainstream and as such, I sort of got to form my own identity (although I was partially influenced by the desire to be "cool" so maybe I wasn't entirely true to my own individuality). 
The downside is, I did all those self-destructive things associated with the rebel, including smoking, drinking, drugs and generally disregarding the rules and defying authority whenever possible...sometimes to my own detriment.
Many years ago I quit the drugs, the drinking and the smoking and it's been a bit of an inner struggle at times. I don't feel very "cool" anymore and the part of me that doesn't want to be known as an "old fuddy duddy" yearns for a little rebellion now and then. Yet, the self-destruction is no longer "cool" and even with the heavy substance abuse long gone, I still have the residual damage to my health and a mountain of debt due to my "devil-may-care" attitude.
Lately, I've been striving to make some positive changes in my life, to break out of old habits that no longer serve me. One such habit is to eat out less often and bring my lunch. It would be a great habit to have, saving me money and helping me to be more healthy yet it was a habit I was resisting. I always had an excuse not to bring my lunch and I often "forgot" to pack a lunch.
One day I was writing in my journal and I realized. Part of the reason I don't want to bring my lunch is because I don't think it's "cool". With more journaling, I realized that I associate packing a lunch with being a "nerd". Totally irrational, I know but isn't that the nature of a self-defeating belief?
So, right there on the spot, I decided I no longer wanted to keep a habit that wasn't serving me. I also decided that since I was the one who made up what was cool and not cool, I could change it. Rebelling against "the man" - still cool, self-destruction - not cool. So, I decided to make a list of what "cool" means to me.
After making the list, I wrote a little bit about what the words mean to me and how they fit in with the person I am now and the person I want to be.
Carefree - I am free to be me, I let go of concern regarding what others think of me
Creative - I can make it up without waiting for permission or worrying about doing it "right"
Independent - I can be independent because I am responsible and in charge of my life, because I have a solid base and a structure to support me
Strong - I am strong enough to set my own agenda and stick to it
Courageous - I have the courage to speak my Truth as I know it rather than bow to what others think I 'should' do
Intelligent - I spend and save wisely, not ignorantly and impulsively
Calculated - I can be cool because I have a plan. I am not "flying by the seat of my pants". I am firm and solid in who I am and where I'm going
Confident - I believe in myself and my way. I don't concern myself with what others are thinking or doing
Connected - I have a crew, a team, a posse and together we can get things done
Conscious - I do what is right by me. I am aware
Leader - I lead by example. I learn from others and delegate those tasks that are "not my style"
In my book, cool people are brave enough to be themselves even in the face of criticism and ridicule. I realized after writing this all out that there is nothing cool about following other cool people's rules. The coolest thing I can think of is to make my own rules and to live by them regardless of what other people think. Since making this list, I have shifted my perception and my habits and I am right now in the process of making changes to my diet and my budget with relative ease. It was a shift that needed to happen because as long as I valued "cool" and felt "uncool" I was always likely to be pulled in one direction or the other. With my new definition, I can be cool and be true to my desires for health and wealth at the same time.
If you have some old, outmoded beliefs and attitudes that are no longer working for you, the book From Sabotage to Success may be just what you're looking for. The first chapter has a belief tree exercise that helps you to identify some of your current beliefs, where they came from and whether or not you want to keep them. The entire book is filled with worksheets to help you define your own life and your own definitions of success. Avaliable on Amazon.com.
For more blogs about overcoming self-sabotage visit icreatehabits.com
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When you think about it, every musical act you know of is using the Master Mind principle whether they realize it or not. They are joining together as a team with a combined vision. You can use the same principle and make some truly rockin' things happen in your life.
Do you have a creative project you want to complete? Do you want to find a purpose for your life?
If so, I invite you to come over to my brand new page called Start a Master Mind Group.com. I'm offering 4 freebies to get you started so you can get a sense of what the Master Mind is all about.
There's nothing cool about holding back. 
